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Medication

April 21, 2019

Mind Altering Substance for example Lithium did make me more abscend from my original nature towards other consciousness patterns which i strongly believe are short lived in me. Therefor the need for new druglike substances to get in an invigorated feeling and altered state of consciousnes gets more pronounced throughout everyday life. It's hardly possible for me to stay in one place for more than 15 min while not consuming snacks or drinks. Walking on a street in an suburbean surrounding is only possible for more than 2km if i shut my perception down by listening music. The sence for the beauty of clouds and the deep blue of the sky was nearly flattened by mood stabilizers thus giving me an rude careless attitude toward my local surrounding even more than before medication. I also became a control freak, fully consumed by work. The long lasting side effects of the substance i got a  prescribtion for and i'm taking in since 2011 are memory loss, sleepeness and emotional numbing which are ironically also symptoms of depression. I was first diagnosed with scizoaffective dissorder which is a really nice word for just simple "behavioral deficits" such as not referring to the topic and speaking out crossing thoughts. You can guess it's quite common for certain people who are normally creative and introverted, but have no problems until they get isolated and cannot make up  solutions by themselfes anymore. I would rather take no medications but another long term side affect is low sleeping ability due to addiction to the dizzynes which gives one relief from your telepathic and visual connections to typically in the emotional field of the body hanging "entanglements to other beeings" simply 2D level angels. A good recommendation for people having problems with these phenomena is to release body tensions which means you have to first be aware of how the body feels and how it changes through social interaction and meditation or excercise. To control your emotions is a goal but one will not get there by forcing the desired coolness into ones elements by simply thought, isolated love or asceticism . Still in my opinion these are all components of an healing approach which gives you back your power over your body and wellbeing of the mind. Medication is a helping tool but personality altering as well as intelligence weakening on the long term.

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